What I learned after our fourth month anniversary with Trader?
1) Relationships are already hard enough. Happy to admit that I’m more than a handful to be a boyfriend too, and can be over-annoying sometimes. Hence, it’s really important that you find someone who really really loves you, and who’ll make an effort to stand by you through thick or thin, or it’s simply not going to work out.
2) The guy carries the relationship. Not the girl. Hence, girls the best thing you can do is to just be yourself and to be loving. How to move the relationship forward really depends on the guy.
3) No matter how perfect a guy is, he also has some flaws. But then again, you just have to be more realistic of your expectations. If you want a sensitive guy who loves you tons, don’t expect him to be a bad boy and send your heart racing in a bad way. If you want a guy good enough to introduce to your parents, be assured that he can be irritatingly responsible as well.
4) The relationship really does get worst before it gets better. The first month is a lot of “I love yous” and being on lala land. However, once realitysets and you realize that you have to worry about some practical issues like money, regular time for each other, etc., you really just need to face it heads on to proceed with the relationship.
5) A long-distance relationship needs a finish line. If you’re just dwelling on feelings, it won’t work. You have to start building a foundation early on that you’re both serious with each other and trying to see if it would work. Otherwise, why even spend excessive time/money on it?
6) You really have to set time for the relationship. My other friend saw his long-distance girlfriend last on July, and none yet right now because things always come up. My friend, things always come up… it’s just a matter of scheduling well, and making sure you getyour priorities straight.
7) When you’re happily attached, all the eligible men pops out (Aaaargh, where were they when I was single?!). However, to keep through, you just think, “Well, they’re great, but Trader loves ME.” Sure places many things in perspective, doesn’t it? 🙂
8) The Ex comes back too and hell, every ex will ask for a second chance. I personally don’t think it’s good to mention this to your current boyfriend, but if you’re happy with your steak, why exchange it for instant noodles? Ummm… hello? The last relationship broke for a reason. Remember that.
9) When you’re traveling, keep long distance calls to a minimum (even answering calls mean that your phone company will charge you). Smartphone is charging me HKD500+ for a 2-day visit to the Philippines for a wedding for around 30 minutes of calls. Damn phone company! 🙁
10) And lastly, celebrate the milestones! We deserve it. For our fourth month anniversary, Trader and I enjoyed an unconventional dinner at Hong Kong’s mutton hotpot place, Little Sheep.
We ordered the set that set us back around HKD 398 + tea and tax fees, but it was soooo yummy!
Afterwards, we watched the romantic comedy, The Proposal, which was better than expected! A perfect way to end our quiet date night. 🙂
Hope that everyone’s had a great weekend as well. Take care as we start the new week ahead!
2 thoughts on “Our fourth month-sary!”
“The guy carries the relationship. Not the girl. Hence, girls the best thing you can do is to just be yourself and to be loving.”
Sounds like “just do nothing and be pampered”. =)
“How to move the relationship forward really depends on the guy.”
A relationship needs WORK from both sides to sustain it. It’s like an empty gift box at first and then both of you put nice stuff into it. Naturally, both of you also take some of the nice stuff from the gift box.
But if one only puts into it and the other only takes, time will come when there’s nothing there.
Blackdove, hence, the word you need to be yourself AND be loving. I agree with you that women just don’t do nothing and expect to be loved and pampered.
To sustain it, yes, work needs to be done by two sides. However, to move it forward, guy has to do it. We’ve seen many cases of girls chasing for a guy for a more serious commitment and fail. If a guy wants to be with you, he will do it on his own.