I think a part of me is still very conservative, and sometimes, I fear that this will not changed. All the years my dad’s training has given me has taken deep roots — and now, I feel like a 45 year old trapped in a 26-year old’s body.

I am for example, stingier than I thought.

Last week, I was in the Big Apple for a business trip. My colleague who is doubtly richer than I am shivered with excitement upon catching her eye on the Coach Store up Madison Avenue.

“Whee…! Coach bags here are cheaper by 30%!” she exclaimed. “Look, this bag only USD 190!”

I mentally computer USD 190 to the size of the bag she just purchased — it was Coach’s smallest, which means that every inch cost at least several hundred NT$.

I wanted to be more excited, to scream and shout on how cheaper the bag is — but no matter how cheap it was, I couldn’t find myself shelling out USD190, USD 290 or USD 330 for a bag, no matter how much I crave for one.

Ironically, Coach bags are one of the low-ends of high-end branded goods.

To date, I do not own a bag that cost that much, no matter how much I can afford it. It’s not unaffordable — I can definitely buy one without starving. But all those years of dad’s training stop me from reaching into my purse and buying one — to hell with everything else.

My mom tells me before I went, “Raven, if you find something you like, buy it! What is money anyway? It is to be enjoyed and you may regret it if you don’t buy it.”

Maybe it’s all about priorities…?

I had no qualms shelling out USD 130+ to go watch Lion King on Broadway and would have been willing to shell out USD 80 more just to see the Blue Man Group (which I didn’t because of lack of time. darn). But for a Coach bag when I have over 10 bags that I can alternately use?

I’d rather save it for something else… a trip to Laos perhaps?

Which is why I can never be a 100% girly-girl. I don’t like shopping enough. Or maybe I like bargains more — earlier this week, I bought 3 dresses because they were on sale for NT$200 each. Now, talk about cheap!

Sexy too. 😛

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My birthday is coming up soon. Every time I celebrate, half of the people are the same… while the other half is different. It just shows how friendship is cheap and how life can be unpredictable sometimes.

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My first time in New York and I didn’t even see the Statue of Liberty.

However, I did get to walk by 5th Avenue (whoopie-doo), view the Empire State Building from a distance, visited the empty Ground Zero, walked through Central Park, took a tour of the Met Museum, ride the NY subway, and visit the glass-cubed Apple Store. Oh, and tried the delicious Gyros which at USD4.5 was the cheapest yummy NY meal I’ve had.

At the same time, I was being mean to, stupidly almost got raped, advised a close relative to get divorced, and rung up a bill of over NT$14,000 in long-distance calls (I am so dead).

Which evens out to… New York was an experience BUT it wasn’t a totally enjoyable experience.

It’s funny how a city so bustling and crowded can be so lonely… honestly speaking, am not earning enough.

Every meal I had cost around USD20+ to USD80! Which is not a minimal amount. Geez, my friend from college didn’t even have the galls to treat me for brunch. Where’s the chivalry, people?!

I left New York physically and emotionally exhausted.

So now am charging my batteries back… today was relaxing, and I got my PC back which makes me happy. I also wanted to leave you guys a shout to tell you that I was alive.

I am rambling.

So I’ll leave you guys for now and collect my thoughts further so I can write more coherent entries. And hopefully, I’d have the time and energy to post pics.

Gotta study. Talk to you soon!