You guys know that I’ve always been busy, and in the past few months, have been bummed out about my dire romantic prospects.
I’ve cried over my ex, mulled over dateless evenings (although I’ve always kept myself occupied with other activities, never a boring day for me) and was at one time, thought seriously about going back because of the lack of quality men in Taiwan.
Finally, I’ve had enough.
After seeing his true colors and understanding who he really is, I’ve finally got the ex out of my system (Thank God! Am so glad I’m so out of there). Right now, though I still hear things about him from time to time, I couldn’t really care less, and hope that he’s finally able to find the happiness he seeks in his life (Jia you!).
As for mulling over dateless evenings, heck, I’ve realized that you did get more things done when you’re by yourself, and I’m simply happy doing the things I love withe people that I like, instead of worrying about whether this guy liked me or not. Now, I kinda wish I had dateless evenings so that I can do my laundry, finish my book, relax, sleep or study Chinese.
As for quality men, I’ve finally decided that it’s okay to be single, and I’m very much content because of it. Besides, there are more important things than love — say, your career and future — to worry about men that come and go.
So now over these past couple of weeks when I’ve been REALLY busy (e.g., finding a house, organizing some events, studying Chinese, etc.), all of a sudden, not one…
but three guys…
have simultanouely started vying for my attention!
WHY GOD… WHY NOW?!!!
Where were they when I had nothing to do?!
First up is GP, with whom I went out two Sundays ago for dinner at Macaroni Grill. Canadian, laid-back and a surfer, we drank red wine (allowing me to be sufficiently buzzed), talked about his friends and mine, and seem to get along quite well.
It was a very relaxing date.
Despite being a surfer dude and his tendency to debate about which part of the pizza was the most important, he likewise seemed quite cultured, expressing interest and excitement in seeing photography exhibitions, reading books such as Jarhead and Elie Wiesel’s Night, and checking out the ongoing Taipei Film Festival, to which he’s invited me to go with him this week.
Then there’s CL and my other friend who we’ll call as ClimbMate, both of whom I mentioned about in my “Who pays?” entry.
Well, as it turned out that I had nothing really to worry about as despite CL mentioning that he prefers to go dutch on a date, he had insisted on paying for dinner at Diamond Tony’s (located at Taipei 101, don’t even want to bother writing a review since the food was s0-so AND the service was just horrific! Don’t even go there if you can), and I merely helped out with the movie and some basketball action at the amusement center.
We ended up watching “Cars,” which was entertaining but not as good as “The Incredibles,” which totally rocked! Besides, the sound system had a problem and the story resembled a lot like, “Doc Hollywood,” where a big-shot goes into a god-forsaken town, and learns about camaraderie, humility and the importance of friends.
Afterwards, we dropped by Sappho to meet up with some friends, where the band, Fluent, was playing. Fluent btw was pretty good, and reminded me so much like Eminem.
What’s funny was that the only thing I do remember about the lyrics were the philosophical words, “Fuck me baby!” and “Chinese girls like to go on all night…” which may be a way of brainwashing us women to give guys what they want. 😉
I think it was pretty much a fully-packed enjoyable date, and I think CL enjoyed it too. As he wrote in an email earlier, “Thanks for yesterday also. I enjoyed your company. Haven’t had genuine for for a long time. I usually don’t feel comfortable with girls whom I met at a club and then have a date a few days later, but I was totally at ease yesterday and enjoyed myself.“
So most likely, there’s going to be a part II, so long as I get my schedule straight. He’s already invited me to do some sports with him, either badminton, pingpong or whatever, so we’ll just see how it goes.
Regardless, he’s the sweetest so far, even going as far as inquiring about moving companies for my upcoming move. And if I need help, he’s sure to volunteer. So that’s kinda nice.
As Mike had said, “See Raven? Finally you found a nice guy who gives you what you want! Who is actually reliable and will be there for you when you need it.“
Whoah…! Slow down, cowboy.
Yes, CL is nice, but he’s a bit shy. Haha, I think I kinda intimidated him when he got to know me a bit better. As he said during our date, “I’m glad I didn’t know who you were before I met you. Otherwise, I’d feel the pressure of having to be more outgoing and friendlier just to keep up with you!“
So we’ll see and just cross the bridge when we get there. 🙂
As for ClimbMate, well, he’s tried to contact me several times to ask me out for dinner. Given his straightforward approach, I’ve already said yes, so right now, all we need to discuss is when (I already have a good idea where he’s taking me).
As I’ve said before, ClimbMate’s tenacity kinda scares me. I mean, how will you react when you meet a guy who compliments you incessantly? For example, he wrote me this email yesterday:
“Called ya, but yr in Uzbekistan or something. Oh well, I know you’re busy and as that is one of the things that makes you so damn attractive, it would be idiotic to find it annoying that you are… well …busy! So I don’t, and won’t!!!”
“Compliments? Well, actually, when you are being all confident, it’s in your face, but more in your eyes… that little, almost invisible, look of vulnerability that does it for me! 😀 Nice to know that there’s an inner Raven behind the one on public display…”
Words like these make me think, “Gee, one of the main reasons why you’re so attracted to me is because I’m busy and unavailable. So, what’s going to happen when my schedule’s already freed up and I am available? Will you still pursue when I’m not that too hard to get?“
And yes, I do know there’s a vulnerable side of me. But how good are you that you can be entrusted with my heart?
Anyway, we really can’t determine up to now whether we’re compatible is about. So right now, I’ve decided to just take it easy, decrease the pressure and just go with the flow. And after the first date, we’ll then see.
So there you go: Raven seems to be multi-dating. The question I guess is, will it work? Is it better?
Frankly, I’ve never really dated multiple people at one short period of time. Society has taught us to be guilty when you’re dating around, but heck, my thinking right now is that I’m single, available and yes, what’s wrong with getting to know several guys at the same time?
Besides, it’s all a matter of terminology.
Looking back on all my dates so far, I can honestly say that most of them can be considered as “hanging out.” Basically, it’s just me and another guy doing stuff together, be it wallclimbing, eating or watching a movie. Just hanging out — no pressure at all.
And this suits me well.
At this point, I’m not willing to jump into another relationship without knowing the guy well enough. I’ve had enough in jumping the gun, only to find out just how incompatible we actually are, and finding my heart broken into itsy-bitsy pieces.
Yes, did it, done that… moving on.
What’s more, dating/hanging-out is fun! It’s nice that finally, I get to expand my social circle and just hang around with different men of various personality/mindset. As the article writes:
Muti-dating can be a way to achieve romantic wholeness by dating partners with differing interests and personalities. Whereas one partner tickles your hike and mountain bike fancy, another prefers your penchant for the opera and fancy dress. Instead of foregoing a relationship with someone who only meets half of your needs, you can enjoy yoga and yogurt with one date; raves and rib eyes with the other and discover with which amour you really click best.
It’s like shopping at a department store — given the number of choices, you can actually make a better decision!
In other words, since I can compare them at the same time, you can actually weigh out the pros and cons, and since you’re not putting all your eggs on a single basket, you can be more objective and not so hung up with just one guy, who may not even right for you (e.g., “I’m lonely, he’s the only one I have so why not?)!
At this point, there’s still nothing wrong since we’re all at a “getting-to-know” stage. So there’s almost no pressure at all, or demands just to keep dating this specific guy at one time (which would seem as if I’m smothering).
So may the best man win! 😀
As for my weekend, well you guys already know how my Friday panned out. As for Saturday, I’ve already talked about how Top-Climber almost died at Long Dong, following a busted carabiner. So what’s left right now is what happened afterwards.
Tired, stinky and exhausted, I first took a shower before heading towards my friend’s house for a lovely Spanish house party. The party came out after DS told me that he could cook, and I called him on that. And that day, he showed us just how good his cooking was, serving super-duper delicious Spanish meatballs, green salads, blue cheese/bacon/asparagus breads, crackers/cheese/dip and some nice Napa Valley wine.
I had a wonderful time.
What made the intimate party better was that I was able to meet his friends from work, and their cool friends from AIESEC.
It was really fun looking at photo albums and talking to people like Ajin (Indian) and I-Yan (Indonesian) who recently got engaged, and told us all about the intricacies of the ceremony. His friend Jorge, also talked about their upcoming climb to Jade Mountain (so jealous!). Overall, people there were very cool… and you know what they say, “Birds of the same feather, flock together.“
So lucky to have cool friends.
But that’s not all, after we’re done with our meals, DS gave us an extra treat and performed some magic shows on us with cards and stories. My god, he was terrific! And we were all clapping afterwards, with expressions of “OMG! How did he do that?!”
Great going DS!
However, the night wasn’t over yet. A bit close to midnight, I had to leave to meet another friend, DC, who is back in Taipei just for the weekend. A very good friend of mine, DC’s friendship is one that I really treasure, so I just had to meet up with him during his short 2-day stay here.
Hence, I rode over to Warner Starbucks, gave him a warm hug and hung out a bit.
And then, I dropped by Room 18 to go clubbing for my friend’s EC’s birthday!
Such a long day.
EC still wanted to invite me for KTV, but I was like, “My gosh, I can’t go on… am so pooped. Next time then.”
And yes, so glad I went home afterwards, as it’s been three consecutive days that I’ve been sleeping around 3AM. Yawn!
As for Sunday, I woke up at 10AM to meet up with another friend for brunch. We went to this place, the Diner, whose food impressed me that I would like to write a restaurant review sometime soon.
Afterwards, I sped to the National Palace Museum to surprise my guy friend, MC, who volunteers there as an English tour guide.
Boy, was he surprised to see me!!!
During the tour, he couldn’t really concentrate as he couldn’t keep his eyes off me the whole time. He kept on blumbering his words, and forgetting his lines, using the words, “basically” and “as such” a million times that day.
He felt he did such a poor job that he complained to me afterwards.
“Can’t you look more interested, Raven? Sometimes, I’d look for you and you’d disappear!!! You just totally ruined my concentration,” he complained.
But you know what?
I felt he did a terrific job — save for the words, “basically.“
In fact, I was very impressed with MC. Imagine, giving a 1 1/2 tour about museum artifacts, remembering all the details and facts. Now, that takes an intelligent man to do that. I frankly didn’t know he had it in him. Besides, the tour itself made me want to study more about Chinese culture and history, so I believe it was a very successful tour.
Afterwards, he changed into casual clothes (he looked very debonair with his suit btw), and we rode his bike back where we met up with some friends. I myself did a little bargaining shopping, and then had dinner again at where else — the Diner!
Then, we walked around Shida night market and hung around my place playing 4X4 (I lost) and checkers (he lost) before calling it a night.
So that’s my busy weekend! How was yours btw?
Anyway, gotta work now! C’est la vie!