Years before, I told myself that if Coldplay was holding a concert in the same country, I would definitely watch it. Apparently, they’re one of the few bands that put on a great show and authentically sing in their concerts.
So imagine my surprise when Coldplay came to play in Manila. And while the tickets cost an arm and a leg, I managed to scour Php 15,000 for two silver tickets (Note: That’s more than one month of minimum wage) just to watch the show.
Now, husband is NOT a Coldplay fan. “I change the radio channel once the DJ puts them on,” he murmurs. Well, he’s not a Linkin Park fan but he did trudge along the Linkin Park concert with me when they visited.
But he’s married to a crazy wife who insists on watching Coldplay. As they say, happy wife, happy life.
So the entire day yesterday, he was murmuring and dragging his feet. We left the office at 7pm already and we arrived at SMX Concert Grounds at 9pm after walking for 1 kilometer since it was so traffic.
“Aren’t you happy that you’re married to a wife who doesn’t complain because she’s walking a kilometer away?” I chirpily asked.
“What do you mean?!” he asked. “You wanted this!!!”
Okay, husband was obviously not in a jolly mood. But nothing will deter me from enjoying the concert. Not even a sour husband.
We arrived 10 minutes before the show started. And while we were in the Silver section, there were still a LOT of people and we could only see the following view from where we were standing:
For Php 7,500, the view is not so impressive. But then again, a Coldplay concert is the great equalizer as there were a lot of better dressed well-to-do concert goers who are also standing like us. Here’s the crowd behind us, haha!
Now imagine one of the coolest bands to ever come to Manila playing at a pricey expense. People are singing along and moving to the beat. And guess what husband is doing?
Yup, that’s husband sitting on the floor at the Silver section of the concert, deleting his trash photos, answering emails, and Facebooking.
I was upset. I mean, given how much money I’ve spent on Coldplay, the least he can do was accept his fate and enjoy the show. Why does he have to sit on the floor to make a point?
To be honest, I wanted to get angry and pout. My heart was troubled and I couldn’t understand why husband wouldn’t like to play along especially since we’re already at the concert?
But as I began to get angry, I decided to see things from his point of view. Sure, it wasn’t his choice to watch Coldplay, and yes, he will make it seem as he’s miserable. But then again, he IS there with me watching, and he did walk 1 kilometer on foot just to make it to the start of the show.
And while he could’ve been more galant about it, honestly, fighting with him does nothing to improve the situation. He will continue to sulk even more, and he may even not want to accompany me on other crazy expensive adventures.
Anyway, we are at the show just like I wanted. So instead of being all pissed about it, why not I just enjoy the show as it’s the reason we are there in the first place?
So I did —- I sang to the songs, moved to the music, and saw Coldplay play in the Philippines for the first time ever.
And I think that’s what marriage is — it’s a series of giving, taking and compromising. Like husband, he knew he couldn’t really change my mind from going to Coldplay so he went along with it. And for me, I know that he might not enjoy it, but heck, he’s there, so let’s just enjoy the concert and have him as the driver.
So whenever people tell me how lucky I am with my husband, I can look at it in two ways. If they know how annoying husband can be at stubborn times like this, they can surely empathize with me. But if you really think about it, the fact that he is still with me against his will is still a plus for him. Hence, you can look at the positive or the negative. Your choice.
For me, I choose to see the positive. I get to watch Coldplay. My husband gets exposed to Coldplay. And in the end of the concert, he did actually put his phone away and went to get me something to drink.
At the end of the concert, I kissed his cheek and said, “Thank you for going with me to see Coldplay,” as he grumbled a little more. “You know I appreciate it when you accompany me.”
I can see him soften a bit. I think he was expecting a fight but was pleasantly surprised to not see a confrontation. “Yeah, it’s fine. As long as we don’t see Rihanna when she comes to town,” he said. “I don’t like Rihanna.”
So we’re not watching Rihanna when she comes. That’s fine. She’s not my ultimate favorite band anyway. But at least, we got to see Coldplay. Which is fine by me.
In summary, marriage is about giving and taking. You won’t always get what you want but who said that you should win every battle you experience with your partner? And while we cannot really control our partners, we can however control how we react to the situation.
We can size our partners up and fight the entire night OR we can be sweet and look at the good side, and fight for something more improtant another day.
I choose to diffuse the situation and enjoy the concert.
How about you? Would you have handled it differently?