I’ve just had a very interesting weekend.
Usually, my weekends are always full. As I’ve said before, I like to plan ahead, and enjoy doing something, anything… during the weekends. Weekends are a chance where you can stay up all night and sleep in the next day. No work to worry about, just living life to the full.
This weekend was different. Aside from a karaoke session with some friends on Sunday, Saturday — supposedly the craziest night of the week — was empty. So I called up a friend visiting from San Jose and got invited to his dinner. Figured, always good to make new friends. He encouraged me to invite a friend, so I asked Karen to come along.
That night turned out to be eventful after all.
First the dinner. We went to this popular kao-rou restaurant called Gan Bei. The meat was pretty good, and the company was wonderful. Got to meet several nice Taiwanese ladies (which can hopefully be good friends). Paul, my friend, was MJAA’s president, and being the extrovert that he is, good and witty conversation flowed like wine.
But then, came a couple of beeps from my phone. Someone texted me a message: Come to Danshui later. My heart started beating faster. Shall I go or not? I knew that this was a decision I had to make fast. It’s so easy to just text a rejection, but if I did, will I ever regret it? Regret not knowing?
I was clearly bothered during the dinner and Karen noticed.
“What’s wrong?” she asked. After much prodding, I told her about the message.
“Well, are you going?”
“I don’t know,” I replied.
“Well, it’s your decision.” she wisely said.
A few agonizing minutes later. I confidently made a decision. I typed up my reply and pressed “Send.“
Most of the time, when we make a decision, we have the luxury of time. We think and dwell about the issue until we make a decision we think is right. That’s what happened with my decision not to date another friend who showed an interest in me and told me about it earlier this week. It’s hard since people told me to give him a chance. But the thing is, I’m not that interested enough.
In this case, I didn’t have the luxury of time — just an hour to make a decision. Sometimes, you’d just have to do it and accept whatever consequences your decision will have. That’s where freedom and reponsibility comes in. How so? Well, if I had said “yes,” I knew that I was willing to put my current relationship in jeopardy. There was no turning back now. But if I said “no,” I knew that there’s no way of finding out what could’ve been. And repeatedly asking myself, “What if?” will never make things better. But at least, I can live with knowing I was tempted and refused it.
So what was my reply? This, I will not tell. And I’d appreciate it if nobody asks. But I’ve made my decision, and I’ll stick with my decision. Maybe I’ll regret it in the long-run. But maybe not.
But this is life. Ever so often, an opportunity comes by and it’s up to you to grab it or wait for the next one. I’ve made my choice. Right or wrong, only time will tell…